About 6 months ago I decided to delete my FaceBook account.
I kept trying to cull down my friends list to remove anyone that was posting
things that were not good for my mental health, but I just kept running into
reasons to keep people even if I didn’t think I wanted to. This person is my
family, this person isn’t trying to be harmful, this person posts cute puppy pictures.
I never got to a place that at least once a day I wasn’t seeing something about
suicide, removal of women’s rights, politics, fear mongering. Taking in this
kind of information on a constant basis without a say in what you are going to
see is harmful to a healthy person’s mental health, it’s can be an anxiety
inducing death blow to a mentally ill person.
One day I was scrolling and getting more and more anxious
and I made the decision to completely remove myself from the situation: I
completely deactivated my FaceBook. I made a post letting people know that I
was going to, and I did it. I have kept my messenger app to continue staying in
contact with my supportive friend group, but my FaceBook pages does not exist.
The first week was ROUGH. I was so used to the mindless scrolling
and I didn’t have that security blanket anymore. I kept trying to open the app
on my phone and it just kept not being there. To be honest, that first week was
anxiety inducing. I wondered what I was missing out on, what might be happening
with my friends that I would want to know about. Turns out, I wasn’t missing
out on much, except maybe the birthday reminders.
After that first week I decided I did want a social media platform
that I could post on and get my thoughts out and kind of show the people I love
what’s going on with myself and my family. I turned to Instagram. I had an
account that I rarely used, so I updated the profile, set my account to
private, and started there. I follow a lot of artists and comic creators, and
people that post pictures of my favorite animals, as well as a few friends. I
have carefully curated an online space where I feel safe and it’s pretty rare
now that I see something that is very upsetting to me.
I would encourage everyone to take a look at your social
media accounts and think about how you feel when you look at them. Do you feel
empowered? Do you feel shameful? Do you feel loved and supported? Do you feel
anxious? Think about how you want to feel and decide if you want to make
change. Then do it.
s.m.
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